Babies & Remotes
I will, on occasion, let Charlotte play with the remote control. She enjoys pressing the buttons, and there’s almost zero chance her button pressing will summon the police to our residence. (She likes the phone, too.)
The TV need not be on for her to enjoy the remote. But, as we learned on Friday, the TV need not be on for her to dial up the pay-per-view pornography, either.
When Ellen turned the TV on, this is what she saw. Charlotte didn’t actually go through with the $8.95 purchase of Nude Ebony Honeys, but she was close. And if you think it was me who (almost) ordered this fine film, give me some credit. There’s nothing I could do that would anger Ellen more than add $8.95 to our cable bill. I’d be sleeping in the basement, which is frankly a little scary. Also, there’s no TV down there. I like pressing the remote’s buttons, too.